Good god, can you STOP singing that already? It's worse than Rasputin. Technically a bit less annoying, but a lot more depressing, which really isn't productive right now.

Fine, you want me to sing something else?

Not that either. Just stop. Shut your mouth.

Come one, you've been complaining for days that I don't fucking pay attention to what's going on around me any more and now that I do take interest you want to stifle me. Does anyone else find this just a tad two-faced?

Yes.

No.

Actually, I find the whole thing rather pathetic. We all know that love or not, desire to prove ourselves or not, there are things we won't do.

Speak for yourself.

No, I think I'm speaking for everyone. Even you have limits on your cruelty.

Funny how people are often afraid of the wrong bits.

Speaking of bits, hey, another Collective-ish! *waves*

*bats at the hand* We're not here to talk to other people, we're here to talk to each other. To settle things.

Why do we do this, again? Post it all out here?

The act of writing. Catalyst, clarifying, forcing a more direct search for words than internalized, silent arguements.

And don't forget the assurance that we won't forget these moments.

*shrugs* I just think there are better ways to do this. It's starting to make me nervous, having all this out here.

Can I just say 'two-faced' now, hm?

That's different.

No, no it's not. Not really. You're putting this out willingly, more or less, and he's not. Given ANY say he'd be locking all this up just as tightly as you would in his shoes.

That's why you're doing it, isn't it? Vicarious courage.

Sadly, no. I wish my motives were that simple. Come on, the rest of you are getting at least as much out of this as I am, most of you far more. Don't play innocent.

Ahem?

Ok, YOU have an excuse to play innocent. Go take a nap or something.

Don't mind if I do. *pads off*

The rest of you... you, particularly-

Leave me out of this.

I think not.

You've been riding her coattails through all of this, it's about damn time you took some responsibility for it.

Ok then, what makes you think I'm getting off on it?

Did I say you were getting off on it? You're memorizing it.

You're fucking using him for a tutor and that attitude is coming close to screwing over what the rest of us are working for.

Oh, come ON. It's not like how I view it affects anything.

If he asked? It would. You've got to back off.

We've already agreed on that, drop it. Twice, then we wait.

Yeah, but YOU at least only agreed because it'll be another nail in his coffin to wait, move it to his subconscious instead of his conscious.

And YOU are just hoping that if you tell him enough he'll ask the right questions and make it stop entirely, aren't you?

No!

Yes.

I agree, actually. Why're you going soft about this? What sets it off?

It's too dangerous. Too fine a line to walk.

WHAT?

You heard me. Dammit, I'm not going to shut up about this, it's an accident waiting to happen. It's like handing him a bottle of nytroglycerine and pointing him at a trampoline.

The prize is more than worth the risk. We agreed on THAT too, if you'll recall.

Consider my vote changed.

You can't actually stop it. Not now.

Not this far along.

Not without causing more trouble than you're already afraid of.

There's got to be a way.

No. Leave it be. This, at least, we DO know how to handle, what to do.

Bang, bang.

Not funny. We don't know if he's going to walk that path.

That would be the point.

You're just going to keep bickering, aren't you? Fine, we'll end this entry here... but not the discussion. This WILL be resolved.

Quickly.

Of course.

...a few minutes pass...

*blinks* Right, forget silence. This deserves speech.

I... don't have anything to say. Stunned.

Would he do it?

Maybe. He's not competition any more, after all. We got him to that point, finally.

He says.

And you doubt him?

Oddly enough, no. Just pointing it out, is all.

Then...?

Would it even matter if I said I was against it?

Now? It might. Right now it might.

..................I am against it. Not now, not for the reasons you would have it done, not like this certainly. If you're going to ask something of him that will have consequences beyond anything he's likely imagining... gods. Please, at least warn him. Have that much mercy on him.

A warning? Of what, that we were going to rip his spirit apart, leave him tainted, for the rest of his life just that much more in shadow in our eyes and eventually in his?

YES, damn it, YES! He doesn't deserve this.

We've told him that what we see in Radu is simply an extention of himself.

But you haven't EXPLAINED... gods, don't you understand-

Silence. I understand. I understand that I will carve away one weakness after the other until he can stand, safe. I understand that this is the third-closest to death I, we, will ever bring him and it is better done now, before, than saved 'till after. Better that he taste this now.

I understand that there is nowhere else for this to go, not after we led him up to this point. Not when we've been planning for this. *slight smile* Hell, maybe he knew after all; look at the timing. Only one post left.

I understand that this will ease the ache that nothing else has touched in days.

I understand that it will be a milestone, of the last things that needs to be done before November.

I understand... I understand all the reasons for this, and I still wish I could spare him.

You won't, though.

No, I won't.

Why?

*sad smile* Because I love him. I, at least here and now, can act on that love.

What if he doesn't do it?

Then he doesn't do it. We'll talk about it after, whichever he does.

...bang bang...